Tween-Agers

group of sixth-graders taps out lines of poetry on computers as teacher Donna Mikkelson offers guidance and encouragement to her young writers.

Their topic—lessons their moms and dads taught them—is a way of paying tribute to parents, says Mikkelson, who teaches social studies, reading, and English to 64 sixth-graders as part of a two-teacher team at Meridian Middle School in Idaho. "The lessons," she adds, "can be simple, like teaching you to catch a ball, or abstract, like teaching the difference between right and wrong."

Student Taylor Bowen scans his poem, then responds to a visitor's question. "The most important lesson from my dad was probably that he's helped me to play sports," he says. "He likes going camping and he's helped me with that, too. My mom has taught me how to use my manners, and how to clean up so I can keep myself organized."

Sports, camping, and tidiness: In a world filled with negative stereotypes about young people, it can be refreshing to spend time with a group of adolescents. Middle school students are thoughtful, caring, rebellious, confused, frustrated, and hopeful young people. They dread homework, thrive in hands-on learning environments, argue with their parents, resent their new role as built-in babysitter to younger siblings, cherish their friends, love their families, and have fears ranging from monsters and the dark to drugs and death.

They often see themselves as being stuck between the carefree days behind them and the more responsible days that lie ahead. "Middle school is a place between little grade school and big grade school," says one Idaho seventh-grader.

Katie Rhode, a seventh-grader at Hellgate Middle School in Montana, says the contradictions about the 'tween years are abstract as well as concrete. "I'm too old for playland at McDonald's," she says, "but I'm too young to drive or to vote. I am eager for what is in the future, yet I dread growing up and leaving my friends. I wish that the fun times I have had would never end. I'd live in that world of my funnest times, but I'd really like to know what the future has in store."

Even the fears of these young people reflect the transitional phase of life they are experiencing. "I am scared of what the future is going to be like, and I'm afraid of the dark," writes one middle school student from Idaho. "The things I fear," notes another student, "are death, monsters, and grades." Adds another sixth-grader, "I fear guns and summer school."

In personal interviews and classroom essays, students in Montana, Idaho, and Oregon discussed their lives, their hopes, their fears, and their joys. During early adolescence, they want more responsibility, more freedom, and the room to make mistakes. "I like to be free and to make my own decisions, even if sometimes they are wrong," writes Holly Anderson of Missoula.

Peer group pressure and negative images of adolescents also shape kids' self-images. Brad Fredericks, also of Missoula, says kids are vulnerable to the messages and pressures they see and hear. "I think that half the teens that do bad things . . . do them because their friends want them to or because they want to be cool and fit in," Fredericks says. And adults also play a role in how their children grow and mature. "Maybe if all the people that chose to have kids would take control and discipline them, there wouldn't be so much teen crime in the world."

Middle schoolers' hopes often are offset by their fears. They want to go to college, but fear it will cost too much. "I plan on finishing high school and college and training to become a registered nurse," says one student. "What scares me is having to get a scholarship for college." They also want good jobs, but fear that they won't be available. "I hope I can get rich and go to college and barely even work because I'm so well off," says one student. "My fear," he adds, "is that prices will grow and I can't find a job and I'll live in a neon green house that's a mess."

Middle school students also want to live in a peaceful world, but fear that violence will escalate. "As our city grows," says Alexis Neufeld, "violence and drugs become more and more. Sometimes I go to sleep fearing that I might never wake up again. I hope that one day we may all live in peace."

Middle schoolers' joys and frustrations also reflect their interactions with teachers, parents, and friends. Listening to middle school-age youth defies the popular perception that all they want to do is break away from family and fly solo. "My family is very important to me," writes Crystal Hooper, a student at George Middle School in Portland. "They love me, and I love them. They are the ones that have a roof for me to live under. They pay the bills, buy me clothes, and give me meals because they care about me."

Kids want the respect of adults around them, but sometimes feel they are judged by how they look instead of who they are. "Other people think middle school students are stupid unless they talk the right way, dress the right way, and look the right way," laments one Idaho sixth-grader. Another 12-year-old says that adults don't listen to kids. "I don't like being my age because adults don't respect me and they don't listen to me."

Other students, though, say their relationships with adults are positive, open, and mutually respectful. "All the teachers I've ever had have listened to and respected me," says Hellgate seventh-grader Amanda Babon. "I believe that is because I give them the same respect they give me." Adds Meridian student Taylor Bowen, "I feel that most adults listen to and respect me because they help me. If I have an opinion, they will listen to it."

Middle schoolers show a high degree of independent thought. However, they agree on one thing: They learn best when they are engaged, involved, and doing things. They repeatedly (and independently) refer to "fun activities," "hands-on learning," and field trips as ways in which they learn best. Low on the list of learning activities are lectures and homework.

"A good day in middle school," says Hellgate student Danielle Taylor, "is when the teachers don't bore you to death with long stupid speeches, and they teach us with hands-on experiments so we're not always reading out of the book. A good day is also when the teachers take a break on work and, like, take us outside."

"Middle school," notes 14-year-old Lindsay Pierce, "is a lot more exciting than elementary school because you get to do things." Adds Robbie Haynie: "I enjoy learning about bridges and how they work. It was fun to make bridges out of toothpicks."

Amanda Burgess, another Meridian middle schooler, agrees with the hands-on approach. "I enjoy learning about science like elements, oceans, and plants," she says. "My favorite is probably chemistry or where you dissect things."

Through all their fears and the issues they face, middle school students remain, by and large, a hopeful, optimistic group. They want to fit into the world and see themselves doing so in a variety of ways. "I fit in the world in nature, where the soul is free and looks don't matter," says Heather Mcalpine of Hellgate Middle School. "When I'm in nature, I feel comfortable and enjoy my surroundings. Everything is happy and so I, too, am happy."

Some middle school students seek to blend in; others to stand out. And some, like Jamie Davidson of Hellgate Middle School, see themselves in a metamorphic stage. "I think I fit into the world like a grain of sand on a beach—not being anyone too special to stand out," she says. "My hope for the future is to become a grain of sand that does stand out.

"I want to be someone who makes a difference in another person's life," Davidson says. "I could possibly see myself teaching physical education or counseling those in need. I don't fear anything in the future, because anything that happens, happens for a certain reason."

Parents: Stick with Kids Through Middle Years

Researchers at Johns Hopkins University have identified six types of parent involvement that can help keep kids engaged in school and connected to family. They are:

Receive basic information on such topics as health, safety and discipline, guidance, and adolescent development
Receive information on your child's progress and about important transitions from elementary to middle and from middle to high school
Volunteer for or support extracurricular activities
Engage in learning activities at home—this type of participation is most likely to increase student achievement
Involve yourself in decisionmaking activities or on decisionmaking boards, such as school advisory committees and school improvement teams
Collaborate with others in the community, such as churches, businesses, social agencies, civic groups, and other organizations that have an interest in children

The researchers found that type two activities above were the most common, while type four were the most difficult to organize.

Parents also can assess a school's willingness to provide meaningful opportunities for involvement by looking at volunteer opportunities; content and clarity of written materials, such as newsletters, brochures, and other school information publications; whether the publications are translated into other languages; representation on school committees; willingness of teachers to discuss curriculum, discipline, and other issues; and inclusion of a parent room in the school.

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Date of Last Update: 9/28/01
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